A MESSAGE TO FATHERS
MY WEEKEND INSIGHT
21/06/2020
Sabiiti Herbert
Today i woke up with a deep longing to thank you for what you do as fathers to raise a responsible generation that sprouts out from you. Raising children is becoming complicated each waking day in the 21st century. As fathers, we have responsibilities to help our children to discover God’s purpose for their lives and ensuring we provide for their needs (1 Timothy 5:8).
Responsible men have always sacrificed everything to make sure they take care of their families, that inadvertently some have forgotten to take care of themselves. Always on pressure to make sure ends meet, knitting plan after plan yet sometimes they cannot even afford new clothes for themselves.
My point however is that amidst all this, there is growing conflict between wives and husbands that some have preferred to sweep under the carpet while addressing domestic violence.
By now, i definitely know the need for me to use the right choice of words & carefully put this across or I might be “stoned” by my lady friends- the desire to control (Gen 3:16).
Some men have ~lost~ given up (resigned) their leadership role as ‘head of the family to their wives in order to live in Peace.
Forfeiting your leadership role does not guarantee that you will have peace in your family, giving up your priesthood deforms God’s original design of marriages and unfortunately, this deformation could go on and on because our marriages are training institutions for future marriages.
I have had many friends say something like “this is a very good idea but madam has refused… or let me see whether madam will accept this”.
Last year person X had agreed with the wife to take their kids for baptism from their village during the Christmas holidays. As Christmas moods were building up, the woman changed *her* mind and opined she would be spending the festive season at her parent’s home. The man obliged for the sake of “peace” in the family. Yeah, that happened.
By this, am not suggesting that you be a dictator but be a good leader. Leadership according to John Maxwell is about influence. Yes influencing in love and respect.
As you take care of your family, do not give up your leadership role, the shared insight is for responsible fathers.
It is however unfortunate and sad to note that the number of irresponsible fathers is steadily growing. They, due to their financial muscle and positions are sleeping around with “innocent” girls and abandoning them at a later stage of life, no wonder the numbers of single mothers too are soaring. These ladies are going through “hell” on earth as men go about with their normal life. Woe unto you, if you’re such a man! Your irresponsible behaviors are not only breaking the future of young women but also killing nations. May the Good Lord deal with you and cause a change of heart. Else, he deals with you so severely if you’re able to take care of that child and have arrogantly refused. That child is innocent and we as men ought to man up and be responsible for our past, present, and future actions. And if you are annoyed with this post, am also annoyed that is too is happening. Some men have resigned their duties of providing at home to their wives. Instead, spend money in bars!
What am saying?
1. Loving your wives does not mean giving up your leadership role.
2. It’s not the ability of a man to produce semen that makes them a father.
I also acknowledge that mistakes happen in Life, but they can be corrected. If you’re a brother/man out there and need help to speak out, don’t hesitate and die in denial. Accept that errors happen, own them up & sure enough the courage to weave through will grow, there is Grace for such in Life too!.
*Happy Father’s Day to the responsible fathers out there!*
sabiiti10@gmail.com